The Secret Killer

  I have devised and elaborate plan of retribution against my annoying coworkers. This plan consists of baiting them with extremely fatty and rich foods. Slowly causing a company wide plague of High Blood Pressure, and possible cases of Gout. I will bide my time, quietly observing them gorge themselves on pork fat. Oh yes, I might lift a slight smile when one chokes briefly on a chunk of dripping Lamb Shank. But they will be no wiser of this diabolical preparation.

 Today I begin:

Innocently enough, just a “Simple Company Potluck” with offerings of potato salads and Spaghetti, Chicken, and all the other little light weight entrée’s brought by my prey.

 For me?

 Ha!!

First of all, call the dish something most can’t even pronounce “Cassoulet”. Then if one the victims actually bothers to ask “what’s in it?”, just respond with a non-emotional “Eh, it’s just pork & beans”.

So today, my own Guyana Kool-Aid:

Cassoulet: (Pork & Beans)

1 lb Pork Loin (Don’t you dare trim that fat!)

1 lb Short Ribs

1 lb Lamb Shank

½ lb Bacon

½ lb Fresh Sausage

1 1/2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 large yellow onion, sliced

6 cups chicken stock

2 cups dried white beans,

2 cups chopped, seeded tomatoes and their juices

1 Head minced garlic 1/2 cup packed light brown sugar

2 tablespoons creole mustard

2 teaspoons chili powder

1 bay leaf (Fresh)

1 tsp dry thyme

1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper

1/2 cup water

Beginning with Braising all of the meat (not the bacon) after coating with a Paprika based rub. Braise the meat with a couple tablespoons of vegetable oil, in a pressure cooker. Making sure to do in batch’s so that you don’t crowd the meat, and end up cooking the meat instead of browning it. Remove meat, and then sauté the onions in the remaining oil. Add stock and beans, making sure to scrap any bits from the bottom of the pot.

 Place lid on Pressure cooker, and pressure cook on high for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, and let the pressure release slowly (About 15 minutes)

 Remove lid and  now add all remaining ingredients, and replace lid to cooker. Once again, cook on high pressure for 15 minutes. And then remove from heat, and allow pressure to release on it’s own.

Have your crock-pot heated up in advance to high, and now transfer contents from pressure cooker to crock-pot. Let simmer (stirring occasionally) until meat has separated from the bone. The sauce should be well combined to a thick creamy consistency. There should be no obvious sign of floating fat or oil (they might suspect something)

What you now have, should be capable of causing a 10 point increase in everyone’s cholesterol count. And triple digit Diastolic readings for my targeted audience.

Enjoy my little Pretties!!!